“Bully made me suicidal”

Let’s begin this blog by comparing physical and verbal bullying. Last week the BBC reported the story of a 14 year old girl who decided to commit suicide. A boy taunted her with racist insults over a period of 7 months AFTER the school stepped in to deal with the problem. She felt she couldn’t confide in any of her teachers and the school had advised her against getting her Mother involved again. Fortunately, her suicide attempt failed.... Read More


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Facebook bully Keeley Houghton to be jailed

Keeley Houghton is the first person to be imprisoned for cyberbullying. She spent 4 years victimising a girl on facebook including a threat of murder. This started when the girls were 14 and they are both now 18 years old. I am glad to see legal action being taken against someone who has run a long and vindictive bullying campaign. The message this will send out to other cyber bullies is bound to be profound. It will also be empowering for the victims.... Read More

The Power of Forgiveness

Yesterday, the BBC reported that two bullies had been convicted of manslaughter. Rosimeiri Boxall died after falling from the third-floor window of Ajose’s flat. She was being attacked by Kemi Ajose and Hatice Can (17 and 13 year old at the time) and climbed out the window to escape them. Kemi and Hatice each claimed the other had said “yes” when Miss Boxall asked: “Do you want me to jump?” Rosimeiri’s parents forgive... Read More

Case Study Part 2

I found Charlie and his Dad, Ian, very easy to work with. They were very keen to learn new skills and were very open minded with the concepts I was putting across. This made the training session relatively short. We did about 5 hours actual training time. (A maximum time would typically be around 7 hours). First of all, we did a couple of exercises on how to feel good under any circumstances. We used body language, imagination, rapport, facial expressions,... Read More

Respect Me Annual Conference

Today I attended Respect Me’s annual conference. I thought it was really good. They had lots of inspirational ideas and a great overall focus. The main theme was on children’s rights. Children have the right to an education and have the right to be protected from harm within schools. Additionally, they have the right to know what their rights are. I like this focus. I’m all for empowering children. When implemented well, it empowers... Read More

Case Study Part 1

On Saturday I worked with a client in London. Both he and his Dad have already written about their experience on an online forum and are keen for me to use them as a case study. I have sent this to them for approval before posting. Here is an outline of Charlie’s situation: He has been bullied physically, regularly, over a 2 year period. Specifically, he was being beaten up by large groups of boys. The bullies would pre-arrange what they were going... Read More

Why is the bully picking on me?

This is the question that seems to crops up the most often from people being bullied. In many of the email enquiries I receive, I am asked this question in various different ways: “What have I done to deserve this?”, “what’s wrong with me?” etc. If you have ever asked yourself this question, I would like you to immediately change your focus. I want you to understand what is wrong with the question. Whose fault is the bullying? When a... Read More

Bullying clip

This is an excellent clip of a bullying situation in progress. I recommend viewing the clip before you read on……. Let’s do some analysis: The bully is being highly intimidating. He is aware that he has an audience – that may, or may not, affect how he is behaving. I would guess that he is putting on a show and wants to show everyone how tough he is. He may still have had the confrontation without spectators, in which case it... Read More

New Testimonial

I’ve just received a lovely email from one of my clients. She has kindly given her permission for me to post it online: hello, sorry its taken so long to get back to you. I would just like to say a huge thankyou to yourself for being so kind to help me and shalaine after you read our story in the paper. What a difference you have made in helping us that now shalaine has more confidence in herself and she has really excelled so much that the... Read More