Bullying Help

Posted: February 4, 2012 at 7:46 am

This post was written by Mr Bullyproof

If you are being bullied then you need to get help. You can go to a specialist, such as myself, you can go to a friend, a work colleague, a family member or, in some cases, the police. Make sure the person you go to is someone you can trust and who will listen to you. Also, have in mind an idea of what kind of help you might want. Do you want someone just to share the problem with? Do you want them to intervene directly with the bullies? Do you want them to source help from somewhere else for you? It really makes a difference if you can give them some direction so that they know what you would like them to do for you.

Of course, you may not know what you want them to do. After all, if you knew all the answers you probably wouldn’t need help in the first place. A good starting point is to consider what the perfect outcome would be for you.

Do you want the bullies to leave you alone?
Do you want or need to get along with the people bullying you?
Do you want to learn how to solve the problem yourself?
Do you just want a sympathetic ear?

Do you just want to lessen the effects of the bullying? Do you want justice (N.B. this isn’t always a healthy option. Justice in the form of revenge may do little to solve bullying problems and in some cases can inflame them). Once you know the outcomes you want, it is much easier to figure out some ideas to achieve them. Share your ideas with whoever you have chosen to tell and invite them to offer their suggestions too. Using this approach will allow you to start forming some good strategies that can make a difference.

At the very least, it is important you are getting support from somewhere. If you are being bullied, especially by groups, and you are experiencing people being horrible to you its essential to get some balance: people who are being nice to you
and supportive of you. Many victims of bullying develop low self-esteem because “the whole world is out to get me.” This can become so powerful that they don’t want to ask for help because “no one would want to help me anyway” or even “I don’t deserve help.” If you have good support then you can avoid this kind of thought process and you can keep or gain high self-esteem. So go and get some.

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